Tree of 40 Fruits

http://twistedsifter.com/2014/07/this-tree-bears-40-different-fruits/

Mind-Boggling Stuff‏

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QM2 and the Captain‏

This would be one of the most dramatic maritime photographs of a Captain and his ship…

Photographer James Morgan decided to create something a bit special to mark the Queen Mary 2’s 10th anniversary.

QM2 & the Captain‏001

When he first suggested placing Captain Kevin Oprey on the liner’s bulbous bow for the photo shoot, people apparently looked at him like he was ‘a bit mad’.

2. However, the idea was clearly inspired as the pictures look astonishing.

QM2 & the Captain‏002

3. The shoot took place at a port off the coast of Bali with two safety boats positioned nearby just in case.

QM2 & the Captain‏003

Commenting on the striking images, Morgan said: ‘It is this towering creature and this little man, it is an incredible juxtaposition. He is an incredible man, this beautiful huge liner he controls every day.

‘It is one of the most epic shoots I have ever done.’

4. Brilliant.

QM2 & the Captain‏004

Deep thoughts…‏

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    “Blessed are the cracked, for they are the ones who let in the light.”

New English Language Word for 2014‏

 Every once in a while somebody gets it right.

This is not yet found in the Oxford dictionary, so it was “Googled” and discovered to be a recently “coined” new word found on
T-shirts on eBay:

Read this one over slowly and absorb the facts that are within this definition !!!!!!!

I love this word and believe that it will become a recognized English word.

Finally,  a word to describe our Future !!!!!!!
New English Language Word for 2014‏

Our Computer Dependency‏

Here is the proof that we have become too dependent on our computers:

Question:

Are you Male or female?

To find out the answer, Look down…

Look down, dammit,

Not scroll down!

History lesson‏

There is an old Hotel/Pub in Marble Arch,London which used to have gallows adjacent.

Prisoners were taken to the gallows (after a fair trial of course) to be hung.

The horse drawn dray, carting the prisoner was accompanied by an armed guard, who would stop the dray outside the pub and ask the prisoner if he would like ”ONE LAST DRINK”.

If he said “YES” it was referred to as “ONE FOR THE ROAD”

If he declined, that prisoner was “ON THE WAGON”

_____ 

They used to use urine to tan animal skins,

so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery.

If you had to do this to survive you were “Piss Poor”.

But worse than that were the really poor folk who could n’t even afford to buy a pot they “Did n’t have a pot to piss in” & were the lowest of the low.

_____ 

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it,think about how things used to be.

Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June.

However, since they were starting to smell brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odour.

Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.


Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water.

The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children.

Last of all the babies.

By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it.

Hence the saying, “Don’t throw the baby out with the Bath water!”

_____ 

Houses had thatched roofs, thick straw piled high, with no wood underneath.

It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof.

When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof.

Hence the saying “It’s raining cats and dogs.”

_____ 

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house.

This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed.

Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection.

That’s how canopy beds came into existence.

_____ 

The floor was dirt.

Only the wealthy had something other than dirt.

Hence the saying, “Dirt Poor.”

The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing.

As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside.

A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a thresh hold.

_____ 

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.

Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot.

They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat.

They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnightand then start over the next day.

Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while.

Hence the rhyme: ”Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old”.

_____ 

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special.

When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off.

It was a sign of wealth that a man could, “Bring home the Bacon.”

They would  cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around talking and ”Chew the fat”.

_____ 

Those with money had plates made of pewter.

Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning & death.

This happened most often with tomatoes,so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

_____ 

Bread was divided according to status.

Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle,

and guests got the top, or ”The Upper Crust”.

_____ 

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky.

The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days.

Someone walking along the road would Take them for dead and prepare them for burial.

They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up.

Hence the custom of ”Holding a Wake”.

_____ 

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people.

So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave.

When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the insideand they realized they had been burying people alive.

So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell.

Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, ”Saved by the Bell” or was considered a ”Dead Ringer”

_____ 

And that’s the truth…Now, who-ever said history was boring ! ! !

Dog/Cat reactions!‏

Your dog’s reaction when you get home
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Your cat’s reaction when you get home.DogCat reactions!‏ 002

How you know a dog is hungry.
DogCat reactions!‏ 003

How you know a cat is hungry.DogCat reactions!‏ 004

How a dog feels after misbehaving.
DogCat reactions!‏ 005

How a cat feels after misbehaving.DogCat reactions!‏ 006

How a dog feels when you get him a doggie friend.
DogCat reactions!‏ 007

How a cat feels when you get it a kitty friend.
DogCat reactions!‏ 008

How a dog steals food.DogCat reactions!‏ 009

How a cat steals food.
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When a cat annoys a dog.
DogCat reactions!‏ 010

When a dog annoys a cat.
DogCat reactions!‏ 011

A dog’s reaction to getting wet.
DogCat reactions!‏ 012

A cat’s reaction to getting wet.
DogCat reactions!‏ 013

A dog’s relationship with birds.
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A cat’s relationship with birds.
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Dog’s reaction to a walk.
DogCat reactions!‏ 014

Cat’s reaction to a walk.
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Cat at 6 a.m.
DogCat reactions!‏ 016

Dog at 6 a.m.
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The Lone Ranger and Tonto

The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their
Tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.

Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, “Kemo Sabe, look
Towards sky, what you see?”

The Lone Ranger replies, “I see millions of stars.”

“What that tell you?” asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, “Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter Past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What’s it tell you, Tonto?”

“You dumber than buffalo shit. It means someone stole the tent.”

Hanging Naked Men‏

Bet you don’t have these growing in the garden.

The flower is called Hanging Naked Men!

 
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It is called Orchids Italica, or The Naked Man Orchid.
They come in all sorts of shapes and, umm… sizes.
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