The wife came home early and found
Her husband in their bedroom making
Love to a very attractive young woman.

And she was somewhat upset. ‘You are a disrespectful pig!’ she cried. ‘How dare
You do this to me — a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I’m leaving you.
I want a divorce right away!’

The husband replied, ‘Hang on just a
Minute, love, so at least I can tell you what
Happened.’ ‘Fine, go ahead,’ she sobbed,’
But they’ll be the last words you’ll say to me!’

The husband began — ‘Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young
Lady here asked me for a lift. She looked
So down and out and defenseless that I
Took pity on her and let her into the car.

I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me she hadn’t eaten for three days.

So, in my compassion, I brought her home
And warmed up the enchiladas I made for
You last night, the ones you wouldn’t eat because you’re afraid you’ll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

“Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were
Dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you’ve had for
A few years, but don’t wear because you
Say they’re too tight.

I also gave her the underwear that was
Your anniversary present, which you don’t wear because I don’t have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don’t wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots
You bought at the expensive boutique and don’t wear because someone at work has a pair the same.’

The husband took a quick breath and continued – ‘She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I
Walked her to the door, she turned to
Me with tears in her eyes and said,

‘Please … Do you have anything
Else that your wife doesn’t use?

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